I have been absent from cyberspace for the last few months. I haven't been feeling my usual purky self. Actually I have been feeling awful. But I am starting to feel better so I am back online.
Thankfully there is a very logical reason for me to be feeling so under the weather. I am 14 weeks pregnant!
I am very happy and excited about this new phase of my life. Now that the morning sickness seems to be diminishing I am starting to actually get excited! We have wanted to start a family for a while but have been waiting for the right time. So here it is.
It is quite a bizarre experience to think there is a little person growing inside me. It has taken a lot to get my head around it all and I don't think I am quite there yet. This week I will hear the heartbeat for the first time. I have no idea how I will react but I hope it helps me to bond a little more with the bean, actually more like an orange now.
I am not very good at keeping secrets so the first few weeks when we didn't want everyone knowing were quite bizarre. We told our close family and friends, knowing we would want their support if things didn't go well. But here we are and the cat is now really out of the bag. Work knows and slowly the gossip mill is working its magic. I am a teacher so at some point I will have to tell the kids. But for now I think I will wait till one of them says "You're looking pretty fat miss!". Gotta love the directness of teenagers.
At the moment there is not much to show for the all action going on inside me and I am really looking forward to my bump appearing. I am sure the time will come when I wish it wasn't there but I love the way your body reveals the miracle happening inside.
The baby is due on February 3rd 2008 and between now and then there feels like there is a lot to do. Especially a lot of thinking to do about parenting and the family by husband and I want to create. One of the best things at the moment is talking to my Mum and Mother in Law about their experiences and what it was like for them to be at home with kids. It makes the whole process seem more normal and the nostalgia and softness they use to describe it really makes me look forward to it all. I also really appreciate their candour about the awful days and the struggles. It helps to know that ordinary women can do the extraordinary job of being Mums, so maybe I can too!
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